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| Testosterone is powerful stuff, Maurice. |
7YO Nagurski: "Da-da, why do women make es-tro-gen, and not tes-tos-ter-one like men?"
Da-da: "Where did you hear about that??"
7YO Nagurski: "Ma-ma."
Da-da: "Ah."
7YO Nagurski: "So why es-trogen, and not tes-tos-terone?"
Da-da: "Because if women produced testosterone, all the men would be dead."
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| Ex. 27. Like their quotidian, active duty parenting counterparts, Empty Nesters and grandparents occasionally experience Post Traumatic Parenting Disorder (PTPD). Nearly half would have to be severely medicated if they weren't severely medicated already. |
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| How many coats of noise-absorbing paint do you have to use before you can no longer hear your |
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| Being Mr. Mom basically means that your mom's curse came true for you, 24/7/365.25. Thanks, mom. |
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| Ex. 10. The Cyberdyne Borg-Mommy 3000: the next step in post-apocalyptic parent evolution. |
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| Ex. 9. In Mr. Mom-Land, if the door is breathing, everything's fine, even on April Fool's Day; especially so. After all, we've all seen a breathing door before, right? In college? Or where was that? Monaco? Anyway, the REAL QUESTION is: which side of the door are you on? |
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| Da-da often uses alien tai chi to unwind. The alien cooperates... most of the time. |
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| Ex. 8: Cleanliness is next to impossible, so roll with it. |
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| Ex. 7. Malls are exciting places. But if you must go, maintain forward momentum... preferably with extreme pastel prejudice. |
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| Ex. 6. Parental LAUGH prompts, installed throughout your house, really help -- AND they double as night lights! |
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| Ex. 5. Maintaining an open mind is easy... provided you keep trying to open it. |
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| Ex. 4. Regular cranial percussive maintenance maintains keen parental fashion sense. |
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| Ex. 3. Keep track of things important to survival. |
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| Ex. 2. Roll with the punches, esp. those inside your head. |
