It's official. At 11:22 am EST, all of the world's turkeys pre-empted Thanksgiving and Raptured themselves into Turkey Heaven, where they'll pretty much do the same things turkeys have done in the past. Except they'll glow a lot more. And gloat about all the spiritually unclean turkeys they Left Behind. Yes, in case of Thanksgiving, this turkey will be unmanned.
So, I guess it's gonna be HAM this year, unless... DAMN.
Crap. Well, at least T-day will be kosher. Pass the tofu, Rabbi.
[MORE up-to-the-minute Rapture news HERE.]