The Seven Days of CAKE

CAKE is powerful. You heard it here, first. Cake can cause Revolutions. It can break marriages (e.g., the bride and groom couldn't agree on the CAKE). Cake in the face can cause riots. Files contained therein can loose felons onto the world, etc. Cake is also key to controlling children. Children will OBEY if cake is in the cards. Of course, said obeyance vanishes AFTER cake. But above all...

...CAKE makes Mondays bearable. Mondays SUCK. Oh, wait... did anyone mention that there's CAKE? CAKE! YAY! Cake also makes Tuesdays easier to bear...

...as do donuts, but let's face it: donuts ain't cake. Tuesday cake can also be prophetic and even stop banking scandals in their tracks. Yes, Tuesday cake is LIBOR Scandal kryptonite. Wednesday cake on the other hand...

... is simply something to look forward to... esp. if you get to dangle a participle and wax elliptic.

Thursday cake is always intense. See? It says so right there. It's also both insousciant and effervescent, in a cakey way. Friday cake, however...

...well, Friday doesn't really need cake -- esp. the same damn cake you've had every day that week... but when it's there... well, Friday cake can be pretty cakey, so you might as well go with it. Which brings us to Saturday and Sunday...

Ew.

Saturday and Sunday ARE cake, which after a whole week of cake can simply be TOO MUCH DAMN CAKE. But even too much cake is good cake!

Cake is indeed powerful. That is, except when it comes to Da-da. Because Da-da doesn't really like cake. Unless it's COCONUT CAKE...

Da-da will walk on hot coals for coconut cake -- even UGLY COCONUT CAKE.