Parenting Horror 101: That Vincent Price Moment

What did you say, Timmy?

All parents have that Vincent Price moment of abject parental horror, that quick notion that occurs during endless tantrummage where even sane parents contemplate throwing their adorable rabid wolverine tot into that vat of acid, or that cauldron of molten wax -- or if you're a modernist, out the airlock. Da-da has mentally chucked his children out the airlock more times than you've had hot dinners. Like any sane and sober Rotarian robot parent, Da-da never actually does this (not that you know of), but it does occur to Da-da about a thousand times a day. And yes, Da-da does pass for SANE, at least on TV. Of course, instead of acting on this terrible impulse, Da-da writes about it, makes fun of it, keeps detailed notes about it for his trial, etc. All parents feel like launching one or all of their progeny into the sun on occasion. It's normal. But wearing a dracula costume all day and singing, "THE HILLS ARE ALIVE WITH THE SOUND OF MUUUUSICCC..." is not normal -- IT'S MANDATORY. Jeez, the neighbors are so judgmental.

Da-da doesn't always wear the cape. Or remember all the lyrics.

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