Ah, Friday, the day 'Scientists Annoying Babies' articles come out.
Turns out that scientists "recruited" (good Nazi word) 1- and 2-day-old infants to see if they could spend all their grant money by bugging babies, presumably to see if we can make children learn the split-second they arrive. Why should you get some slack, Timmy? What, were you born yesterday? WELL, GET TO WORK. YOUR ONE-YEAR-OLD TEST SCORES NEED TO BE HIGHER. WE WORK HARD AT THIS LEVEL, SON.
here, science, let me make you hot: "DR. MENGELE, UNATTENDED BABY IN AISLE NINE... DR. MENGELE...."
just you try electroding my NINJA PRE-SCHOOLERS, science-boy. good luck. we're all counting on you.