Of Lizard Parking, Orb Routing, and Why Leon Isn't Helping

i don't know why, but friday is ostensibly the day when the weird and the interesting train-wreck in noodle-y, steel-ribboned heaps. to whit:

this morning, the BOSS (my wife, not Bruce Springsteen; that's such a whole other blog) loudly announced to my youngest and oldest (they have no names, we just call them OLDEST, YOUNGEST or DAMMIT) as they ran amok in a saurian frenzy instead of eating breakfast, that it was time to, "PARK YOUR LIZARDS." i even wrote it down, as i have no memory anymore, though i only managed to capture half of the lizards being gamboled about (officially, there were 11 lizards participating, not including me, but five wound up behind the TV):















then, after Les Deux Magot-lézards'
petit déjeuner, my youngest becomes hell-bent on embodying the Physical and Transport Layers by routing two enormous red and purple packets (played by beanbag chairs) through the kitchen and onto my boots, by way of the Infotainment Stuporhighway:















while reviewing these shots, i saw yet another in a long line of ORBAGE that follows my youngest everywhere:















they're in every other shot. what can i say? orbs love him. here's another from his recent b-day:














anyway, later in the day, as deafness and orb possession seized both my children -- as they're wont to do on fridays -- i actually got to quote "BLADERUNNER" to my unsuspecting audience:

DADA [to oldest]: "Your brother is helping clean up those blocks, why aren't you?"
OLDEST: "What do you mean I'm not helping?!"
DADA: "I mean you're not helping. Why is that, Leon?"

and for whatever DNA-entwined, psychic phlogistoni-sympatico geek-reason, both boys and i started laughing -- probably because they think Leon is a funny name, though i was laughing for a different reason. inspired, i pulled out my "FINAL FINAL DIRECTOR'S CUT FINAL" of said film and showed the boys a snippet of the Leon scene:

- "What do you mean I'm not helping?!"
- "I mean you're not helping. Why is that, Leon?"

then were were all laughing again. even the orbs were giggling. so, to commemorate this warmly psychic family moment (WPFM), and cap off Yet Another Bizarro Day in the Haunted Monkey Cage (YABDitHMC), i made a new shirt:













the orbs said for you to buy ten. EACH. don't mess with the orbs, leon. they know when you're not helping.