31.8.10

I am NOT an Animal... I'm a Human Da-da


Every time Da-da picks up the monkeys from the kid gulag or gymnastics or their snake husbandry lessons, Da-da get these LOOKS from other moms. Females, that is. REAL ONES. Remember them? Da-da doesn't. Anyway, the moms always give Da-da and the few other Mr. Moms the trout eye. Why the shunnage? Da-da's not a stalker, a pedophile, a weirdo (not like those other freak-bastards). Sure, he has a beard and hasn't bathed in a week and has a crazed gleam in his eye from all of DARPA's midnight rDNA harvests, but he's really very sweet, sorta like Julie Andrews, but with a penis. And a complex understanding of Boolean disintermediation. Sympatica, hermana! And so what if Da-da skips and sings, "Madame Butterfly" arias all the time. Lots of people skip.

Ex. 1. Manliness.

Still, [sniff], despite our common ground, the white-blood-cell moms continue to treat Da-da like an invading virus. C'mon, ladies! Let's commiserate! Let's swap recipes! Make JELL-O! Da-da will even let you wear his Mr. Mom uniform:

Ex. 2. SUPER Manliness.

Hey, wait... maybe Da-da's kryptonite because he's so so HOT. Ah. Yes. That must be it.

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