NASA's Been at the Corn Liquor Again

This is what NASA's been drinking every day for two weeks to come up with their latest Mars cover story.
Besides being every NASA bartenders' secret ingredient, Mellow Corn also tastes just like corn flakes.

[NOTE: This post was de-listed... but not by me. And a whole other post about NASA being dumb and hiding things has been deleted. Thank you so much for your censorship, Google. You suck.  So, here it is again.]

Ok! Let's get into it.

NASA has finally -- after two... er, THREE weeks of intensive hopped-up/corn-liquor PR dot.LIE meetings -- come upon a swamp gas story to explain the GIANT EXPLOSION on Mars, which factually occurred about 100 miles up from the Martian atmosphere. They story? It was a meteor storm that did it, smacking Colonel Mustard with debris from Comet Siding Spring. In light of this incredible new evidence (incredible that it took NASA three weeks to hatch something so lame), let's look at the evidence.

BOOM! Of COURSE that's a meteor shower. Caused by swamp gas. Damn Colonel Mustard!

Oh, here's the live version, below, just so you can see all the 400 billion meteors necessary to cause such an explosion:



Ok. That's pretty much self-explanatory. Now, let's look at the EXTRA weird plasma meteor shower energy that inexplicably smacked into Mars from the South Pole, while Siding Spring was approaching from the northeast.

No, it's not a lens flare, as lens flares don't move from south to north and explode. Giant jelly donuts, maybe.

GOSH that nonexistent lens flare swamp gas reflection might be energetic as hell, with a completely different trajectory than Comet Siding Spring, but it sure had nothing to do with the enormicon explosion, no. That's definite, Musta been a really big donut meteor... er, shower.

Here a few more views of it that swamp gas lens flare thing.

Just to be thorough, here are some actual 35 mm and 50 mm lens flares for comparison:

Identical swamp gas bigfoot reflectionage indicative of the gullibility of the general public.

Now let's look at the enormous wealth of NASA meteor shower images they're recorded from all those probes and satellites in Martian orbit and on the ground...

...oh. All they recorded was this snippet from, "A FEW GOOD MEN." You know, 'cause we can't handle it, our advanced degrees and volumes of common sense totally worthless.

If you must read the NASA pap, here it is. You of course believe every word of it, because that's the kind of trusting soul you are. Gosh, the sheer amount of pictorial evidence on NASA's site alone... oh, wait. There isn't any. We have to take their word for it. AGAIN.

Swamp meteor donut gas. Musta been.

Those damn swamp jelly donut meteor showers make a damn mess, Mabel. Just ask NASA.

MARS-GATE: Mars Explosion Mystery SOLVED [UPDATED]

BOOM! What the hell was that, NASA-pants? Not that you'll ever tell us. At least now we know.

[NOTE: THIS POST HAS BEEN HACKED, SUCH THAT THE LINKS ARE NOT THE RIGHT LINKS, AND VIDEO REMOVED. WHY IS THAT GOOGLE? GOSH, I WONDER.]

The mystery of the Martian explosion/energy release has been settled, at least in Da-da's mind. (See bottom of post.) An excellent write up of what transpired can be found HERE. [But not anymore. You'll see why.] The resultant explosion video is near the bottom of this post, and tha latest from Lynn the Internet Oracle is at bottom. In the meantime, watch this video from BPEarthWatch; excellent as always...




...oh, wait. You can't.

The above video has been contested by SLOOH as being in copyright infringement... Google caving in to the establishment, as usual, which hurts them in the eyes of the public, in Da-da's opinion. However, it seems SLOOH is using footage obtained from publicly funded facilities, making their data public and their copyright claim erroneous -- and frankly suspicious. This entire thing has suddenly betrayed so many as part of the MSM story machine, trying to control info to the public's detriment, exposing NASA (again), various astronomers, scientists and observatories -- as well as obvious trolls all over the internet coming out of the woodwork to poopoo this astronomical event -- not to mention the utter silence from the mainstream media and alleged "science" publications. The sudden blackout is very telling. This whole thing is a fascinating klieglight suddenly shone onto how the world really works when it comes to "science." Welcome to "Mars-gate."

So, the video showed some enormous, "magnetic energy ball" (which looks a lot like Da-da's "Death Star" from June of 2013) that may have struck Mars related to the comet. Seemed definite, but who knows? Perhaps some comets are not comets at all, but uber-dense chunks of magnetically charged star cores (neutron stars, etc.) floating around like magnetic time bombs. A serious mystery. Like living in a Larry Niven novel.

NASA's Mars site says that all their spacecraft/probes are working nominally despite this BOOM, but that's clearly impossible. Da-da's sources will have an answer shortly. SLOOH will have to say something eventually.

Sure looked like the Death Star to Da-da. (THAT'S NO MOON.) This thing swooped in from the south as the comet approached and...

And finally, here's the footage of the explosion/energy release that SLOOH can't touch.



And finally, so as not to leave you hanging, the Mars Explosion Mystery is apparently SOLVED:

MARS EXPLOSION MYSERY SOLVED

[UPDATE 2-23-15: NASA DISCONTINUED DUE TO LACK OF INTEREST.]

NASA's Top 23 Future Redundant Project Names for a Redundant Shining Future

Uh...

Given NASA's fine tradition for completely ignoring anything of interest (their oxymoronic probe, "CURIOSITY" comes to mind) -- or worse, airbrushing out detail that the public is apparently not ready for (read CONTROL) -- Da-da thought he might share some of the names of future NASA missions he discovered when he went through one of their filing cabinets.

Feel free to add your own in the comments section.




1. Project INDIFFERENCE [previously launched, but who cares?]



2. Project BLASÉ



3. Project YAWN



4. Project YAWN II (Legacy Project)

5. Project YAWN III (Legacy Redundancy Project II... er, III)

6. Project APATHY 8000



7.. Project GROSS EXPENDITURE [there are a lot of these already]



8. Project GROSS EXPENDITURE II [see?]



9. Project MALAISE



10. Project WHATEVER



11. Project CANARD [in export for years]



12. Project HEEDLESS LUMP [in Senate subcommittee]



13. Project HEEDLESS LUMP II [in another Senate subcommittee]



14. Project INSENSATE [already installed in all govt. offices]



15. Project FEIGNED INTEREST [see above]



16. Project SNOOZE



17. Project LASSITUDE 3000



18. Project LASSITUDE REDUNDANCY SERIES 3000



19. Project BLINDEYE [a component in all missions]



20. Project FNORD

21. Project MENDACITY 3000 SERIES [a govt. program since 1913]



22. Project INCURIOSITY [already on Mars]

23. Project SLACKER 9000 [just a blank piece of paper in a drawer]

It landed. So, get out already.

 

Mars Curiosity Light Mystery SOLVED?

Of course. It's Spongebob NASA-pants.