Showing posts with label sam adams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sam adams. Show all posts

16.4.12

History Has Been Drinking (or "SAM, JOHN... THE BRANDS ARE COMING")

237 years ago, pizzas were delivered in 20 days or less -- or your next pizza was free.

Uh oh. Da-da woke up with a history ramble. Historic ramble? So, buckle up those hob-nailed lyres and get those caveman colonists to a chariot-nunnery pronto, Tonto.

Speaking of untenable segues, kids studying American history are taught that, back in 1775, Paul Revere hit the road on the night of April 18 (um, that's 237 years ago, when Da-da was only TWO) to alert the countryside that British troops were on the move, primarily because the scones and double cream were reported to be much better in the next town (they weren't). Revere and another rider, William Dawes, reached Lexington, Mass., to warn Sam Adams and John Hancock that they were soon-to-become unpaid corporate figureheads of legend -- aaand that they were also going to be arrested for not paying all those outstanding horse certification and parking fines -- oh, and hey, they also needed to lock up all the scones. But, alas, everyone was captured and were made to eat the OLD scones (sans double cream and strawberry preserves, which is against the Geneva Convention), but what they were all really trying to warn us about was that THE BRANDS WERE COMING.

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