Roger Goodell's New Football Uniforms for a Kinder, Gentler NFL (Fashion Victim)

Da-da has uncovered Roger Goodell's secret new uniforms for a kinder, gentler NFL of the future. Here's the Indianapolis Colts' new look for Fall, 2012. Now that Peyton's gone, they're loosening up the tradition a bit. Obviously for some teams, it's more of a business than a game these days, as you'll see.

Whoa. Here's the Miami Dolphins new AWAY uniform for Fall, 2012. AWAY.

Here's the NY Giants' diminuitive HOME uniform for Fall, 2012.

And here's the NY Giants' AWAY uniform for Fall, 2012.
Uncle Fester power lunches Auntie Mame.

The Seattle Seahawks seemed a bit confused in their, "Lurch meets Baby Huey" offering, strangely modeled by Tom Brady. (It's 4th and 24, guys.) The Oregon Ducks are apparently also interested in this look.

The Vikings looked nonplussed...

...while the Jets looked pretty much the way they always do.

The Oakland Raiders were certainly not to be left out. You go long, girl.

And Da-da's favorite: The Miami Dolphins' new HOME uniform for Fall, 2012 just screams, "TACKLE ME" -- which is the name, oddly enough, of the team's new signature fragrance, designed by The Czonk.