|That's right, Da-da is The STIG-DA-DA, one of the Three Wise Stigs|
known for his unique accumbularation... but all he really does is race minivans. Very very fast.
And with that bombshell, it's time for some original, Da-da-induced STIG-MA-DA-DA-DA-isms (and if there are any mistakes, that'll spawn STIG-MA-DA-DA-DA ERRATA). Here we go:
- Some say... The STIG-DA-DA was only created to test minivans... and that his hands are sewn into a Nomex straightjacket.
- Some say... he once ate a windmill made entirely of cheese... and that a river will NOT run through him.
- Some say... The STIG-DA-DA once ingested a lump of coal and pooped out a diamond... and that Julie Andrews sings about him constantly.
- Some say... he was invented by BEES... and his spare testicle runs St. Petersburg.
- Some say... The STIG-DA-DA's underpants won the war -- any war -- and his shinbones are hewn from blocks of pure aluminium.
- Some say... his tear ducts are the main source of all horseradish... and that he can only understand the Language of Love.
- Some say... The STIG-DA-DA's mons pubis orbits the planet Jupiter... and his pheremones once ruined the CERN supercollider.
- Some say... his notions of antedeluvian art are unprintable... and he's considered a genius of snake husbandry.
- Some say... The STIG-DA-DA twice pedaled a Panamanian freighter through the streets of Mogadishu... and that his oeuvre is unpronounceable by Jeremy Clarkson's pet monitor lizard.
- Some say... he has no grasp of Euclidean Anamorphism... and that his tacos require no shell.
- Some say... The STIG-DA-DA can make small children do his bidding... but only because they share the same brain.
- Some say... that he begins and ends in ellipsis... and automatic doors open for him when he's not even there.
- Some say... The STIG-DA-DA can be conceptualized only in sets of 13... and that he ironically suffers from Triskaidekaphobia.
|Some say... The STIG-DA-DA once drove a "CHRISTINE" movie stunt car so fast she spontaneously burst into flames.|