27.6.15

Something Wicked-Good This Way Comes?


                                                                                                                                                                                                [img: composerinthegarden]




Had to share this high weirdness. If you don't read Da-da's blog much, or are new to it, there's often been a paranormal/anomalistic element to it; children are indeed the ultimate anomaly, but they ain't the only one. This aforementioned strangeness has been occurring more and more, primarily because Da-da lives on a special piece of property which he calls "Spook Central," one that's haunted in a number of ways, a byproduct of special properties Da-da will go into at a later date. 

Suffice to say that unusual things happen at Spook Central all the time, some of them are patently bizarre to the unitiated. When the occur, Da-da takes note, but when they occur in THREES and fours and more... Da-da pays extra attention.

Case in point:
1. VIBRATING TREES. Thursday night, Da-da noticed his trees were... well, VIBRATING. Their leaves and branches were shuddering, trembling in virtually no wind. Never seen that before. At first, Da-da thought we might be having an earthquake, but there was none. Da-da chalked it up to general weirdness, but then in the wee hours of Friday morning...

2. GODDESS VISIT. Yes, early Friday morning, Da-da was visited by... well, a GODDESS. No, she wasn't vibrating. And NO, it wasn't Da-da's regular domestic goddess (she was sleeping soundly, making occasional miniature warthog noises, in a cute way, o'course). This visiting goddess seemed to be a GODDESS to Da-da, not that he's ever met one... but there's no other word for her. Da-da sensed that she was spiritually BIG. Really big. Planetary big. But gentle. And not from these parts. Da-da awoke to see her huge FACE before him, smiling gently, saying hello. And NO, this has never happened to Da-da before, not in goddess form, anyway. And YES, Da-da was wide awake, thank you very much. Then the next day...

3. NORMAL SKIES. We don't have "normal skies" anymore. There is always -- always -- a ton of aerosol spraying where Da-da lives, but Friday day/evening there was none whatsoever. We saw our first normal “organic” sunset in at least two years, with scudding clouds and no aerosols (looking much like the image above). It's been such a long time since Da-da's seen a "normal" sky that he stopped and stared at it a long time. It's that rare. Then...

4. UFO! Friday evening, amongst these scudding pink clouds, just past dusk, Da-da saw a(nother) fast-mover UFO. We see things here at Spook Central all the time, but this was Da-da's first “classic” white, teardrop-shaped, quick squirty one (it went FAST -- pause -- FAST). Of course, the most frustrating thing about this is that no one in Da-da's family was impressed! They see them all the time, with Da-da being typically jealous. Anyway, that makes… six definite UFOs Da-da's seen within a quarter mile or less. And no, Da-da's not going to MUFON it.
Why are these things significant? Firstly, they're all very good omens. Then there's their temporal proximity. During a quick meditation tonight (with Bronko, Da-da's youngest, trying to make it rain), something spoke to Da-da and flat-out suggested that this September IS IT, the main EVENT. Ok, he's not gonna argue.

So, something weird wicked-good this way comes, so meditate like crazy. And be happy.

And YES, it's obviously time to stock up on alien slime.

17.6.15

Ape Scenes From Da-da's Mind-Roasting Summer


Scenes From Da-da's Mind-Roasting Summer
"Hey, you apes! Go roughhouse out front... AND KEEP YOUR STINKING PAWS OFF THE MONOLITH."

12.6.15

The TAO of Da-da -- Now Available

Da-da's third book is available on Amazon 

front jacket

Back jacket

Christopher Lee, GsYMB



Christopher Lee, one of Da-da's favorite actors, is reportedly dead -- but he's been dead before, LOTS OF TIMES. He's used to it. Instead of saying something so trite as, "Christopher Lee RIP," which Chris would hate, Da-da will instead say: "Christopher Lee, GsYMB (Godspeed You Magnificent Bastard)."

Bronko & Nagurski's First Day of Summer

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
 [Linkage thanks to Anomalistic Christian the Bearded] 

10.6.15

"THAT'S INFOTAINMENT!" (Sung to, "That's Entertainment") -- A Postmodern Carol (#24 in a Series)



Da-da's reissuing a few of these, featured in Da-da's third book, The Tao of Da-da: or, "Strong Winds CAN Blow All Day Depending on How Much Sugar's Been Ingested." Enjoy.
 
THAT'S INFOTAINMENT!

[sung to, "That's Entertainment"]


The gown with the 'mazing markdown
Or the pants that make you dream of romance
Or the scene where the clothes all come clean!
That's infotainment!

The lights on the low purchase price
Or the bride with the bra extra wide
Or the doll that really gives it her all!
That's infotainment!

That hair-knot overwrought is simply teeming with sex
On a gay divorcee who really uses Bowflex
To develop T-Rex pecs
While a guy's playing soccer
As he oozes oz-blue blocker

The jerk pretends to have too much work
And the boss who is thrown for a loss
By the skirt who is rubbing out dirt!

The world is a store,
The store is a world of infotainment.
That's infotainment!
That's infotainment!

The doubt after the jury is out
Or the thrill when they're buying the shill
Or the chase for the font in boldface!
That's infotainment!

The claim made by folks with no shame
Of the thing made by slaves in Beijing
With a shape
That makes you look like an ape!
That's infotainment!

It might be a sleight where the clothes all come clean
With bubbles tackling rubble from a greasy machine
Some great legal use of chlorobenzene
Described with a downbeat
By stars from 21 Jump Street

The brag may be waving the flag
That's for sale even when he's in jail
Hip hooray!
The American way!
The world is a store
The store is a world of infotainment!

Get thee behind me, economy!

9.6.15

The Quincunx Has Fallen and It Can't Get Up



For the FIFTH year in a row, Fall has come early to parts of the Northern Hemisphere (in some places, Winter never left), arranged its half-decade neatly into a box and is waiting patiently for someone to wake up and smell the Hyperboreans. Yes, this is Year Five of leaves on Da-da's trees changing early and dropping late May/early June. What does this mean? Well, if you share an open mind with Da-da, you might wonder if half-a-decade's instance of early Fall is significant, juryrigged climate data notwithstanding.

That's it. Just an observation, and lots of questions:
  • Will anyone ever remember the definition of quincunx?
  • Will the sun's slumber continue?
  • Will solar lethargy combine with the 50+ volcanoes going off (adding enough gas and dust to the upper atmosphere) to make Winter 2015 one of the worst in recorded history?
  • Are we on the verge of The Next Ice Age?
  • Will Da-da EVER get World Series tickets?
Da-da knows the answer to at least one of those questions. Koyaanisqatsi, indeed.


5.6.15

"Da-da, What Do You Do All Day?"



Glad you asked Da-da that, Bronko. Da-da makes sure things are well stocked...



...sculpts WHERE NO CAT'S GONE BEFORE...


...competes in Competitive Balling at a high level...


...turns fire hydrants into Cthulhydrants...


...violates physical laws...


...and he is his own boss. Any more questions?
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