16.12.15

"CAROL OF THE SMOKED MEAT" (Sung to "Deck the Halls") -- A Postmodern Carol (#1 in a Series)

The TAO of Da-da
Is he pulling those sausages from his pants??

NOTE: The following is an excerpt from Da-da's recently released third book, The TAO of Da-da: Or, "Put Down That Xmas Yak and Start LIVING You Inebriated Central Banker." YES, it makes a fabulous gift, where have you BEEN??

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Da-da can tell that you're all dragging this holiday season (Da-da and Santa use the same NSA monitoring system), so we KNOW what you need. Besides that. Ready? Of course you are. 

Can there be anything more inspiring than carols about smoked meat? No, there can't. So, here's a festive aper├žus into what A Man Called Da-da will soon be singing in your head. All day. You're welcome.

Now, get out of bed, dress in red, put on your head and inject cheer, instead. Or something like that. And please don't rhyme. It's annoying. Anyway, put down the bong and SING, you stylish inebriated apes, SING: 


Carol of the Smoked Meat
[sung to the tune of, "Deck the Halls"]
"Deck the halls with boughs of sausage,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Tis the season filled with costage,
Fa la la la la, la la la la."

"Jump we now in bacon barrel,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
Troll the ancient smoked meat carol,
Fa la la la la, la la la la."

"See the blazing fool before us,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Strike the pork of loin some more-us.
Fa la la la la, la la la la."

"Follow me in linky pleasure,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
While I tell of drool-tide treasure,
Fa la la la la, la la la la."

"Fast away the cold beer passes,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Hail the brew, ye lads and lasses,
Fa la la la la, la la la la."

"Sing smoked sausage, all together,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Heedless of the health bellwether,
Fa la la la la, la la la la."
Doesn't that feel better? Wait... did somebody OINK? Uh oh, here he comes...


NEXT CAROL: SANTA CALLING.

1 comment:

Kent Smith said...

Submitted for you approval:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uP8BIykKls

I'm thinking of having my band cover this song.

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