"WE NEED A LITTLE BUSINESS" (Sung to, "We Need a Little Christmas") -- A Postmodern Carol (#4 in a Series)

In keeping with postmodern sentences that all ostensibly begin with annoying prepositional phrases -- and for what's become the holiday buying season more than the actual spiritual event itself -- man, this sentence SUCKS -- A Man Called Da-da now offers you this postmodern ditty and a way out of his horrible grammar:

We Need a Little Business

[sung to the tune of, "We Need a Little Christmas" with apologies to Bronislau Kaper]

Haul out the folly
Ramp up the fee before my spirit falls again
Sell off the stock please
I may be rushing things but, check the calls again now

For we need a little business
Right this very minute
Panic in the windows
(Fox) Carols that will spin it

Yes, we need a little business
Right this very minute
It hasn't snowed a single morning
But Santa, dear, it's global warming

So crank up the chintzy
Turn up the longest string of blights I've ever seen
E-lect the fruitcake
It's time we put some whack-O in that Oval Thing now

For I've grown a little meaner
Grown a little colder
Grown a little sadder
Grown a little bolder

And I need a little barcode
tattooed on my shoulder
I need a little business now!

For we need a little boozage
Need a little snoozage
Need a little flinging
bringing The Hereafter

And we need a little trashy
"Happy ever after"
We need a little business now! 

NEXT CAROL: WOKE UP, IT WAS A ZOMBIE MORNING.